Desperate Domestic Diva

Posted in Alphabet Soup on October 17, 2004 | Permalink | Comments (6)

Since I just KNOW that all five of my regular readers will find this absolutely fascinating (YAWN) and since I always aim to please, it is with pleasure and without a hint of sarcasm that I bring you the following:

Domestic diva turned inmate (always with the multi-tasking!) Martha Stewart updated her website from Alderson Federal Prison (aptly nicknamed Camp Cupcake) with an open letter to us all.

For those of you who aren't going to bother clicking on the link (Gasp!), I'd be happy to sum it up for you:

She says the guards and inmates are nice.

Then she gets rather vague and simply says that she has been "very busy."

Strangely enough, she doesn't once confirm or deny the recent rumour that she's scored lots of points during an in-prison Scrabble game.

Her winning word?

ESCAPEE.

6 Comments

martha said:

wow, who are these people sending gifts and money???? does Martha stewart need money? I wish they'd gotten the name and address just slightly wrong and the gifts and money had come to me, I am a Martha... and today IS my birthday! :-D

October 17, 2004 6:19 PM

Cherryflava said:

Hi Red.

The elusive email address. Site is coming along well. Did you get married or something while I was away...or am I reading all skew?

October 18, 2004 1:54 PM

martha said:

woah, red, married?>???? what's this????

October 18, 2004 8:11 PM

Dariana said:

Hey, you didn't count me, lol. You have 6 readers. I just never commented before. :-)

October 19, 2004 7:32 AM

pylorns said:

I'll be damned. Guess what, I was surfing through blogexplosion and hit your site. I guess this stuff really does work well.

October 19, 2004 9:14 AM

kdeweb said:

If anyone can make a prison stay a positive thing, it is Martha Stewart.

October 19, 2004 12:43 PM

is a South African girl living in South Africa. That doesn't sound very original, we know, but you might find it remotely interesting when you learn that she has only recently returned to South Africa for the first time after a nine year, one month and two week (non-stop!) stint in the United States where she accidentally became an outlawed alien (also known, especially in immigration circles, as an 'illegal immigrant.' We prefer the term 'outlawed alien' ourselves). During her reversed exile from her homeland, she kept herself occupied by winning this website (but only after shamelessly bribing the judges) and thus being unleashed on the web where she slowly, leisurely became the World's Laziest Blogger; by being a nanny and by attending sci-fi conventions in search of other aliens. In the US, she also made her sailing debut, her international acting debut, tried and failed to learn the piano, and never learned to cook. She is hopelessly addicted to coffee, dogs (especially Labrador Retrievers), how-to books (with a particular fondness for her copy of the Time/Life A - Z Medical Encyclopedia), and she tends to grossly overuse parentheses (we're not kidding) during her attempts at writing, which you may - if you really have masochistic tendencies - subject yourself to by reading the words to the right of this column. If you REALLY and truly STILL want to know more, you can read her C.V. here.
Or you can ~~stalk her~~ send her some love via e-mail at: redsaid[AT]gmail[DOT]com

The Wish List (Because yes, she really does need more how-to books. Honestly!)

online

kdeweb : If anyone can make a prison stay a positive thing, it is Martha Stewart.... [go]
pylorns : I'll be damned. Guess what, I was surfing through blogexplosion and hit your site. I guess this st... [go]
Dariana : Hey, you didn't count me, lol. You have 6 readers. I just never commented before. :-)... [go]
martha : woah, red, married?>???? what's this????... [go]
Cherryflava : Hi Red. The elusive email address. Site is coming along well. Did you get married or something whil... [go]
martha : wow, who are these people sending gifts and money???? does Martha stewart need money? I wish they'd ... [go]