August 2006 Archives

An Introduction

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On the ominously dated 06/06/2006, in the murky shadows below Table Mountain, two South African bloggers had a clandestine face-to-coffee-cup meeting. (He had the handsome, open face; hers remained hidden behind a large coffee mug, because THAT is how seriously she took the fact that it was a secret meeting!)

That get-together was long anticipated. From the time, way back in 2004, when his site had been the first to pop up when she sat in front of a computer far away in the United States and searched for ‘South African Blogs.’

He returned her first, awkward comments on his blog with gracious comments on her own infant site and continued, for some reason still completely beyond her, to remain a loyal reader, egging her on with his words of encouragement.

Forward to her homecoming to South Africa and the above-mentioned meeting.

And now the result of that above-mentioned meeting held on that demonic date can at last be revealed and introduced to the world: This new website.

Please read it, link to it, graffiti its URL on to walls and overpasses.

And, when you leave lots of comments, don’t forget to mention that you just adore the writing! The design too, of course, but ESPECIALLY gush about the writing!

Senior Moments

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My mom to my aunt: Here's the money I owe you.

My aunt: I don't want to take it now. Give it to me later.

My mom: I'll forget.

My aunt: Forget what?

My mom: I don't know. I can't remember.

On Wednesday night my beautiful sister and her boyfriend were the victims of a hijacking and an armed robbery in Johannesburg. The gang of four attackers didn't steal the car because it became wrecked during the incident, otherwise they probably would've.

I'm very relieved to tell you that they are alive (despite being shot at no less than FOUR TIMES. Luckily the four bastards couldn't aim to - pardon the pun - save their lives).

My sister is obviously rather traumatised, to put it mildly.

The shock and horror of South Africa's rather high rate of violent crime striking us so close to home has our whole family reeling. Especially me. I'm honestly not taking it well.

And her poor boyfriend? This is the second time in less than a year
for him. Last year he was the victim of an armed home invasion
during which he and his kids were tied up, held up at gun point, taunted,
threatened and robbed.

To top it all off, my mom was robbed of her cell phone while she was
grocery shopping yesterday. It was in her jacket pocket and a guy bumped
into her and pick-pocketed her. Considerably less earth-shattering,
yes, but still... it leaves one so angry and frustrated at the
pointlessness (is that even a word? I can't even think today) of it

And meanwhile, our Minister of (Un)Safety and (In)Security has said,
on record, that white people are making up crime; that it's all in our
minds. Oddly enough, ALL of South Africa's people are suffering under
this 'phantom' crime, and all of us will continue to suffer as he
displays such blatant ignorance and disregard for our safety and his
lack of initiative to do anything about it.

I am SO happy that my sis is alive, but I'm also SO sad that it even happened in the first place.

Yes, I know that violent crime and bad things happen everywhere in the world, but here, it seems everyone has been personally affected, or knows someone who has been affected, by violent crime. And not once during my nine year stay in the States did I meet anyone who had been hijacked. Sure it happens there too, but it's not nearly as rampant there as it is here.

I'm so sad, because there's so much more to South Africa than this. We have the potential to be a great destination and an even greater nation. It is undoubtedly beautiful here, and despite the current chill (but it is winter after all, so I guess I should tolerate it a little longer), our weather really is remarkably lovely. And, like the weather, the majority of the people are genuinely warm with sunny dispositions.

Enough unnecessary blood and tears have been spilled onto and seeped into this soil. Where her heart of gold has kindly pulsated to a gentle rhythm for centuries, it has now contracted in pain, and Mama Africa is once again silently weeping for her Southernmost child.

UPDATE: My heart has just broken a bit more. Check out what a friend just sent me.

"Grainy," because all these pics were taken with my cell phone. Let's pretend it was done on purpose, for artistic effect, shall we?

So, if a picture really IS worth a thousand words, then prepare to settle in for a hefty epic.

By the way, most of the pics you're about to see were taken around the same time as my one and only mug shot.

Below is the view (or rather, a vague idea of the view, because it's really much more impressive in real life) from my bedroom here at my mom's house. That mountain range is known as the Outeniqua, which is a Khoisan word meaning either "they who bear honey" or "place of honey." (At least all the translators were sweet enough to agree that honey was somehow involved.)


The bamboo wind chimes outside my mom's art studio provides a restful vibe. (Or maybe it's my recently upped dose of antidepressants?) Very Zen though, yes?

wind chimes.jpg

Room with a view.jpg

And remember that book gig I had in April? Well, these were my trusty assistants.


Popping into the office to take my coffee orders.


My other assistant emulating me on the job.


The absolutely perfect and very generous welcome home present I received from my brother-in-law. A book for every year that I was gone, and one extra for pain and suffering. (He didn't specify whose pain and suffering.) Had I known I would be rewarded for every year away, I would have stuck it out for at least another decade!

welcome home present.jpg

Just some of what my mom gets up to in her art studio.

mom painting.jpg

And now I've officially pushed the limits on my daily allotted data. (I've worked out a strict "data diet" in order not to go over my cap. (And y'all KNOW how I feel about dieting! Let's just say, no wonder it contains the word "die." Suddenly all I want to do is eat all the Gigabytes my little laptop and my internet connection can possibly generate!)

Oh, these tiny bytes hurt the deepest! Only 30 days to go before I get a new share.

Suddenly I LOATHE months with 31 days...

is a South African girl living in South Africa. That doesn't sound very original, we know, but you might find it remotely interesting when you learn that she has only recently returned to South Africa for the first time after a nine year, one month and two week (non-stop!) stint in the United States where she accidentally became an outlawed alien (also known, especially in immigration circles, as an 'illegal immigrant.' We prefer the term 'outlawed alien' ourselves). During her reversed exile from her homeland, she kept herself occupied by winning this website (but only after shamelessly bribing the judges) and thus being unleashed on the web where she slowly, leisurely became the World's Laziest Blogger; by being a nanny and by attending sci-fi conventions in search of other aliens. In the US, she also made her sailing debut, her international acting debut, tried and failed to learn the piano, and never learned to cook. She is hopelessly addicted to coffee, dogs (especially Labrador Retrievers), how-to books (with a particular fondness for her copy of the Time/Life A - Z Medical Encyclopedia), and she tends to grossly overuse parentheses (we're not kidding) during her attempts at writing, which you may - if you really have masochistic tendencies - subject yourself to by reading the words to the right of this column. If you REALLY and truly STILL want to know more, you can read her C.V. here.
Or you can stalk her send her some love via e-mail at: redsaid[AT]gmail[DOT]com

The Wish List (Because yes, she really does need more how-to books. Honestly!)


  • Redsaid Author Profile Page: Terra: YES! Wait... you didn't think that I would be this possessed to post for NO REASON, did ya???... [go]
  • Terra.Shield : OH! ... [go]
  • Marco Author Profile Page: Be a bit like serving drinks at AA?... [go]
  • Marco Author Profile Page: I personally think it is a mindset that has been cultivated over the years, and one, if not stemmed,... [go]
  • Redsaid Author Profile Page: Ms. Crazy Cat Lady Pants!!! Squeeeee! Sooo good to see you! (I thought NO ONE was bothering to read ... [go]
  • Ms. Pants : Kitties don't get enough credit sometimes. (All times, if you ask me, but I'm a Crazy Cat Lady.)... [go]
  • Redsaid Author Profile Page: Hey Tamara! I know, right?? That is a tough act to follow indeed. I adored that dentist. He used to ... [go]
  • Tamara Tipton : Well, I am not sure how any dentist could live up to that standard! LOL! I hope your appointment was... [go]
  • Redsaid Author Profile Page: I'm really really glad that I'm not the only one, Po! Sometimes I drive myself mad with all the what... [go]
  • Po : Those questions run through my heads for various times in my life too, that is for sure!... [go]
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