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is a South African girl living in South Africa. That doesn't sound very original, we know, but you might find it remotely interesting when you learn that she has only recently returned to South Africa for the first time after a nine year, one month and two week (non-stop!) stint in the United States where she accidentally became an outlawed alien (also known, especially in immigration circles, as an 'illegal immigrant.' We prefer the term 'outlawed alien' ourselves). During her reversed exile from her homeland, she kept herself occupied by winning this website (but only after shamelessly bribing the judges) and thus being unleashed on the web where she slowly, leisurely became the World's Laziest Blogger; by being a nanny and by attending sci-fi conventions in search of other aliens. In the US, she also made her sailing debut, her international acting debut, tried and failed to learn the piano, and never learned to cook. She is hopelessly addicted to coffee, dogs (especially Labrador Retrievers), how-to books (with a particular fondness for her copy of the Time/Life A - Z Medical Encyclopedia), and she tends to grossly overuse parentheses (we're not kidding) during her attempts at writing, which you may - if you really have masochistic tendencies - subject yourself to by reading the words to the right of this column. If you REALLY and truly STILL want to know more, you can read her C.V. here.
Or you can stalk her send her some love via e-mail at: redsaid[AT]gmail[DOT]com

The Wish List (Because yes, she really does need more how-to books. Honestly!)

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Copyright belongs to the author (ha ha! She called herself an author!) of this website.
October 11, 2006
Dear Redsaid the blog
Shameless Plugging

My dear Redsaid the blog,

Oh, my little darling, I'm so sorry that I've been neglecting you so! I know that even at the height of my laziest blogger days, I used to pay much more attention to you! I promise I have not ventured out to redder pastures, even though the other blog that has been taking up my time lately DOES have a distinct red hue.

Anyway, thing is, unlike with you, I'm not a single parent anymore. I'm raising this other blog, your half-sister, with a guy. And, typical of so many men, he expects ME to change that baby blog several times on a daily basis. (But then, in all fairness to him, he DOES put the coffee and the food on the table! So I really don't mind doing the rest.) And since I've been faithfully doing that, more than once a day, I'm actually beginning to suspect that maybe being a two-partner team in raising and nurturing a blog isn't such a bad idea!

I want you to know though that I'm NOT done with you. You will always be my first baby and if you and our three imaginary readers will bear with us, you might just be as frequently updated as your sister one day. Or, all right... at least once a weekday then.

By the way, I haven't told you much about your sister yet: Her name is Jetstreaker.com and she is all about gossip and the upperclass (and those on their way to serve them champagne!).

She's not a snob though. Rather just a bit cheeky and opiniated. She already has many male followers, because she frequently provides pictures of sexy bikini-clad models and other celebrities. But she has plenty for the girls too! And even though she gossips about international celebrities, she also really likes to chat about what fellow South Africans who are notorious or famous for something, get up to.

When I introduced her here for the first time, some of our less-imaginary readers responded to our call and actually went over and left comments on her! So we'd just like to say a heartfelt thanks to them.

Anyway, Jetstreaker and her dad have, through their unfathomable faith in me, actually made me believe in myself a bit and I'm slowly starting to think that just maybe, I can be a professional writer again after all.

As you know, you and I have been through a lot. In fact, our lives pretty much began unravelling a year ago and I (and subsequently you as well) were plunged into the indigo depths of depression and the mute sadness that goes along with it.

Every day, with their help (and the drugs!), I'm getting a bit better though, and that depressed girl, the unkempt one who wears black a lot and skulks in the corner, is showing up less and less...

Redsaid | 09:22 AM