now that the shock has worn off a tiny bit and the coffee making and drinking dilemma have been sorted out (Quick hint though: never EVER chew coffee grinds. It's awful on the teeth and quite messy and just generally distasteful), I can proceed with the Blogging Acceptance Speech.

She fumbles with the microphone - producing an eardrum-splitting whistling sound in the process - coughs nervously and gracefully pulls the back of her gown out of her stockings.

In a small voice, she says: "Ladies and gentlemen..."

She squints into the dark auditorium, then continues to give the acceptance speech of a lifetime:

"Ladies and gentlemen... I would just like to say that I'm... speechless."

(I've always wanted to do that!)

But alas, dear readers (Wow... are you guys for REAL?!? I’m not used to having genuine readers – sad, I know, especially considering that I used to be a reporter and all – and I just hope that I can amuse you guys as much as I amuse myself. Ha ha ha. See?), you are not going to be let off that easily! So please brace yerselves darlings, because I’m now going to gush and be grateful and mushy and corny.
(*This means that I’ll probably continue to overindulge in my gross overuse of parentheses, exclamation points, asterisks, etc.)

You're REALLY in for it now, because apart from a "luxury" seaside vacation in an RV courtesy of a South African radio station (also during those infamous high school days!), I've never won anything.

So, cue Alanis Morissette’s Thank You song and let’s begin.

Firstly, I have to thank Emily yet AGAIN (I’ve promised her that I’ll stop, because I’ve already spammed her with all my thank you e-mails), because this contest was her brainchild after all! So, thank you again, dear, and thank you also for the domain name. I’m afraid that you’ve just created yourself a blog-O-monster! (Just call me Frankenstina!)

Also, thank you in ADVANCE for all the tech support I’m going to need from you. I’m convinced that I’m going to try and test your patience several times over the next few months with my web and tech stupidity. Here’s hoping that you never regret doing this though! One thing I know for sure is that I won’t easily commit blogicide ever again with you by my side! Oh, and thanks for the e-mail account that is a part of this! It’s soo coooool!

Then, Christine, my gracious hostess via Blogomania for the next year: thank you soooo much! May your wedding day tomorrow (! Wow!) be a blast, setting the tone for an amazing marriage.

Joelle and BlogMoxie… this design ROCKS! Thank you for staying up and burning the midnight oil to get this done. You are an artist and a genius! I can’t even begin to fathom having to do something like this myself.

Bob, thank you for the “additional script programming.” See, I’m so web savvy (NOT!) I don’t even have a clue what that means, only that it sounds really important and time-consuming and I appreciate it because I can hardly send and receive e-mails by myself (seriously, I’m unfortunately not kidding. See above-mentioned bit about forgetting to add water to coffee in case you’ve any doubts!).

And then (and I can’t believe this entails even MORE cool stuff!):

Thank you Eve (I really, really dig Spiderman! I actually went through a whole intense comic book reading and collecting phase in high school (before falling down the manhole. Oh, and no, Jennsabsent, I never did get that boy! Poor thing probably dislocated his arms when he had to hoist me out of that hole!). My wise-ass friend AirMatix wants to know if the gift includes some type of body suit. I told him that a SpiderMAN suit wasn’t designed to fit over boobs, big or small (and I’ll leave that bit to your (overactive, I'm sure)imaginations.). Thank you so much. I’m SOOO excited!

Then, Joz and Lomara, thank you VERY much for the generous Amazon gift certificates. You guys rock! I think I’ll use it to expand my ever-growing how-to collection!

To the honorable Judges (and I’m not even sure who all of you are yet!): Thank you very much for deeming me worthy of this honour (and it really is an honour!). I believe it when you say that this decision was a tough one to make and that it came down to a very close call!

Which brings me to the next thanks: To my fellow prize-winners Carmen and Kalisa. Congratulations to you both and I don’t doubt for a minute that you deserved this as much (or even more) than me! To you guys (and to everyone else who entered) keep on writing (Kalisa, get a blog!) and thank you.

And lastly (phew! Yes finally!)… To everyone who has already been kind enough to come by and read and comment (and who are STILL commenting! Wow, this is AMAZING!!! Is this what fame feels like?!? Hahahaha!) and congratulate me… THANK YOU! Having actual readers (yeah, I’m still not over that!) is a very novel concept. Maybe I should change the title of this blog to Redsaid and GASP… a few people actually listened! Ha ha. Naah, I think it’s perfect just as it is right now, don’t you?

Thanks again, everyone. I can't believe your generosity and I'm humbled by the talents of everyone who is making this possible.

I seriously hope that I can live up to this!

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (More delayed reaction. Can you blame me though?)

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