In bed, watching television. Temperature is 103F, but it feels like at LEAST 150F. Must remember to wear sunscreen, even though it appears to be raining, because everything is damp.

Zoning in and out of The Today Show (thank you, NBC, for giving us a break from Katie Couric on weekends. How can ANYONE be that chirpy this early in the morning?! She's a robot, I'm convinced).

Suddenly, a strange, yet very melodic song begins to play. Then there's this little boy on a tricycle. He is riding so fast, his chubby cheeks are wobbling in the breeze. His lips are pursed with concentration. There's a strange look in his eyes.

The camera pans down to the pavement just as the tricycle's front wheel makes an easter egg go "splat!"

We see that the whole length of the pavement is lined with chocolate Easter eggs. And a bunny! There's a real, live, white bunny with a trembling nose at the end of the line of easter eggs. The camera zooms out. The boy is heading straight for the other easter eggs AND THE BUNNY! HE IS GOING TO HIT THE BUNNY!

The other Easter eggs go "Splat!" "Splat!" "Splat!" as the boy rides over them. This is a little serial killer in the making. He is enjoying this far too much!

A little girl screams somewhere off camera.

The bunny is frozen... The only sign of fear in its little pink triangle of a nose, which is trembling uncontrollably.

There are only three Easter eggs left before the bunny...

"Splat!"

Two...

"Splat!"

I think I'm going to scream!

One...

Abruptly, the tricycle stops, not even an inch from the last Easter egg and the bunny.

If bunnies could look relieved, I'm sure this one wouldn't have looked it, because it was still too shocked to move anything but its trembling nose.

A few voices begin to chorus something about an Easter parade and trying Mary Sue (or something like that) candies today, bringing home the fact that the music had never stopped.

Words flash across the screen: "Some traditions are worth saving."

I zone out.

The boy brings water and medicine.

"I just had the most absurd dream," I croak through chapped lips. "There was a bunny, a real one, and this little boy on a tricycle was trying to kill it!"

The boy looks worried, leans close and feels my forehead. "You are burning up! Here, sit up and take this." He holds up the glass. I'm about to take a sip when I hear something familiar.

"THERE IT IS! MY DREAM! LOOK!" I point at the television. The excitement nearly brings on a coughing fit, but I drink the water and the boy manages to see and hear "my dream" without any interruption.

"Oooooooh!" he groans at the part where the little demon child is heading straight for the bunny.

At the conclusion, he doesn't know whether to laugh or shake his head, so he does both. "Now that must go down as one of the worst commercials I've ever seen. Did they really think that nothing will say "Easter" better than a devilish toddler on a tricycle mowing down Easter eggs and heading straight for a bunny?"

"That's probably why I thought I was hallucinating the whole thing!"

We decided that the copy writer must have dreamed up the concept while suffering from a very high fever, because honestly, since living in Maryland I've seen some rather awful commercials, but that one takes the cake... or rather, in this case... the Easter egg.

Perhaps feverish copy writing can be my new career. I don't think I'm ever going to get better anyway, so I might as well start planning my flu-ridden future.